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“I gathered myself for the final effort. ‘Get on with it! Move!’ I told myself. I was not afraid of dying, but I didn’t want to collapse when I was already technically free. I was so close to my goal I could smell it. I began to anticipate the wonder of it. It is only in times of famine that you realize the joy of being fed; it is the pain of the disappearance of a loved one that reveals the true nature of love; it is only in captivity that you can gauge the bliss of liberty. There was only one thing to do – to walk, to keep on walking and to think of nothing else.” - Pin Yathay, describing his escape in Stay Alive, My Son
An emotional first-hand account of life in "Democratic Kampuchea," Pin Yathay's Stay Alive, My Son describes the author's experiences during the 21 months following the Khmer Rouge takeover of Phnom Penh in April 1975. During this period Pin loses everything: his engineering job, his home, his parents, his wife and children – everything except his life. The book is moving and personal, yet also educational. It avoids encyclopedic history but scatters relevant facts and historical context throughout. As a result, it seems to me a great book for those unfamiliar with the Khmer Rouge; the accounts are informative yet touching and tangibly real. Political analysis is generally broad – perhaps oversimplified but easily followed. Readers will leave the book with a basic understanding of the Maoist ideology and political climate that fueled the revolution. The author himself is fascinating, in part because of his initial reluctance to renounce the Khmer Rouge regime. His undying belief in the goodness of his countrymen is – I would guess – something to which many intelligent and educated Cambodians fell victim. What makes the book special is its loving depiction of the characters involved. The author's father was a favorite, as was the relationship shared between Pin and Any, his wife: “We died, the desire of life dying before our bodies. Babies were born in Khmer Rouge families and among the Ancients, but there were no births among the New People. When the stomach is empty, desire is no more. ... In Don Ey everyone was chaste. Our bodies were wasted and there was nothing more to stimulate them. Female beauty was a thing of the past. Strangely, in emotional terms, that didn’t matter at all. As our bodies wasted away, as the rest of the family died, so we became increasingly all in all to each other. Once, I had taken such pleasure in the way [Any's] hair brushed her neck, the feel of her slim body, the depths of her dark brown eyes. Now the hair was lank, the body bloated, the eyes dimmed with disease. Physically, there was nothing left on which to base love. Yet we were more in love than ever. As our bodies weakened, our love grew – a strange irony, given that by destroying our bodies the Khmer Rouge sought to destroy our souls – expressing itself in the ways we touched and spoke and helped each other. When we shared our illicit fruit with Nawath in the darkness, we found strength in the sharing, and the touching, and the wordless tears at what had become of us both.” Pin and his wife decide to flee Cambodia when his fate at the hands of the Khmer Rouge (death) becomes certain. The decision to leave behind their son, Nawath, is the emotional climax of the book. Heart-wrenching and personal, Stay Alive, My Son brings the devastation of Cambodia's civil war home. You cannot help but admit the mistakes of everyone involved: the French, the Americans, the Chinese, and yes – Cambodians themselves. << Find this Book on Amazon.com >>
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![[Book Cover Page: Stay Alive, My Son]](images/books/stay-alive-my-son.jpg "Stay Alive, My Son")